The Waiting Room of Unanswered Prayer

I was in the waiting room the other day. Not at the doctors office, or my auto mechanic. Or even the Secretary of State. This was God’s waiting room. You know…where we go to wait for our prayers to be answered. 

I was sitting there with a number of people who looked rather fidgety and distracted. The reading material on the table in the middle of the room didn’t surprise me. It was a Bible. But no one was reading it. We were all just striking up conversation in our nervous downtime, asking this question to one another: “So…what prayer are you waiting for God to answer?” The answers varied. There was a woman who said she was praying for a husband. A husband who was waiting for his wife to find Christ and go to church with him. There were others, like an older gentleman who needed a healing. A small child who hoped and prayed her little cat would survive a sickness. And a pastor who was believing for a new building to house his church.  

     There I was, listening to all of the “patients” in the waiting room. I was kind of expecting the room to be  silent, actually. There are many scriptures that command us to pray and believe.  There are powerful verses, like the one in Isaiah that asks us to wait on the Lord, so that our strength will be renewed. Others telling us to be still and know He is God.  Still another encouraging us to cast our cares on Him, because He cares for us.

But I didn’t experience that kind of atmosphere. It felt more like moaning, complaining, almost angry with God. Like spoiled little children angry with their parents. 

I was a bit surprised, but went with the flow. After all, it’s what I’ve been doing most of my life anyway. That was when God sent His son, Jesus, to the door to call the man next to me in to His office. The man excitedly jumped to his feet, rubbed his hands together in greedy glee and ran in after Jesus.  I watched him as he ran through the door and was curious as to what would take place beyond that door. So, I got up, cracked the door open a bit and peeked in. This is what I heard:

Jesus : So…How have you been?

Man:  Umm…I’m…good?

Jesus: I am so glad to see that. I love you very much.

Man: Yea..I…love you , too. Listen, Jesus. I understand you have to go through this kind of thing as a general rule before you give me what I have been waiting for, but really…can we just get to the reason You called my name? I know you have that promotion I have been praying for! Does it come with the full pay raise and company car? This is awesome!

Jesus: No, I haven’t allowed that to happen yet. It’s not in my plan for you at this time. I just love being with you. It’s hard to slow you down long enough to listen. I love you!

Man: Jesus, really. Let’s not ruin this good thing we’ve got goin’ here, me and You. You know…I pray, You answer. I tell you what I need, You make it happen. It’s pretty simple. I like it that way! I pray, You give! No strings attached!

Jesus: Is that why I saved you, son?  Don’t you know how much I long to be with you? The very blood I shed on that cross long ago made you righteous so we could finally fall in love. I became sin for you so that we could have the fellowship I have always longed for with you. Haven’t you desired the same thing? Don’t you remember long ago how we used to talk long walks together in the morning? Just you and Me? I miss those times. You have made your life so complicated that you no longer have the time to sit and enjoy our relationship.

Man: I know.

Jesus: There is no condemnation if you are in Me. I gently but sternly talk like this only to those that I love deeply. And I love you deeper than any ocean I created. My love for you goes beyond the heavens. My faithfulness towards you reaches to the sky. I long to ease your pain of needing to be accomplished and I no longer want you to try and prove yourself to Me. I love you with an unfailing love. I always have. I always will.

Man: I love you too, Jesus.

Jesus:  I am working on your behalf, as well as all of my sons and daughters.  Please go back to the waiting room and let all of my children know that. But will you let them know, most of all, how much I long to be with them? Will you tell them of My love for them? Will you comfort them with these words, in their time of need as they wait upon Me?

Man: I will, Jesus. Yes.

As the conversation ended, I stood a little from the door as the man came back out and did exactly what Jesus asked him to do. He told us of Jesus’ unending love for us. How Jesus died for a relationship with us. How much He missed us. How much He desired us.

I turned in silence after this man’s announcement and saw all of my brothers and sisters shedding tears of joy and thanksgiving for these words of comfort.

I, in turn, left to find others to tell them the same thing.

The Devil's New Playground: Pop Music

I have been doing a study on satan worship and the occult in current pop music, especially R & B and Hip Hop. I've been a student of pop music for decades and have NEVER seen or heard anything like it. Everyone from Rhianna to Lady Gaga. From Beyonce and Jay-Z to Ke$ha. Kanye West. The list goes on and on. Some may try and convince me that these artists use satanic imagery and lyrical content only for shock value, that they only do it to for attention and sales. And they are right. But what they can't see is that the god of this world, satan himself, has found that through the arts, ESPECIALLY pop music, he can reach more youth than ever before. Don't believe me? Just go watch some of their recent videos, or read some of their lyrics. Here are just a few photos to open your eyes: 

A still from Ke$ha's video, "Die Young", which has over 29 million views

Lady Gaga under the flag bearing "The eye of Horas" and giving the hand symbol for 666

Famous photo of Aleister Crowley, deceased founder of the church of Satan. Notice the pyramid and the eye

Jay-Z displaying the quote "Do What Thou Wilt" from Aleister Crowley's book, "The Book of the Law"

The main emphasis in what is known as "Satan worship" is the exploitation of self and pleasure. To worship one's self and to experiment every carnal desire are among many ways to receive power and fame. 

Ke$ha wearing her jewelry and body paint

Beyonce pictured here in symbolic costume: Baphomet images

 Baphomet, the symbol of the satanic goat, usually portrayed as a half human, half goat figure

Kanye West shown here with many occult symbols

Rihanna in numerous photos: The eye; Baphomet; the horned hand gesture

Moms and Dads, educate your kids and pray over their minds, that the Holy Spirit would convict them while listening to this music. Friends who are fans of the above artists, I implore you. Do your own research with this in mind: Pop music in our generation is the most powerful propaganda tool to come along in centuries, possibly ever. Pray that the Spirit of Christ would reveal the truth about what you are witnessing with your own ears and eyes every day in this very dark hour in musical history.

Read 2 Corinthians 10:3-5. In verse 5, what three words are used that refer to our mind making it clear what Satan is fighting for? And with these types of images and words inundating us daily, what do you think will happen to your moral compass? Your kid's decision making?

This is a crucial time we are living in. Let's guard our hearts.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23

10 things I should have noticed before I turned 49

I feel totally silly for admitting this. How could I have missed them? It’s like I have been walking around in some kind of time warped bubble, just chewing gum and skipping along through life without observing some of the world’s simplest things. I’m sure there are more, but it took me 49 years to  figure these out.

10) Earth's sunsets move from one side of the sky to the other in different seasons. It’s over there in the spring and summer and now it’s over here in the fall and winter.  How could this be?

9) Women want to be listened to. They don’t want to be fixed. This, again, should be a no brainer. 

8) Smiling is awesome.  People who smile are normally happier than me.

7) Speeding only gets me to the next red light quicker than the cars I pass.

6) There is a reason why doctors call it “practicing” medicine - because they aren’t good at it yet.

  
 5) Friends are precious. When you cook them food and give them things, it makes them really happy.

4) No matter how hard I try, I will never figure out all of the words to “Fame” by David Bowie .

  
 3) Forgiveness and trust are not the same thing. This one was huge.

2) Everybody is a little nuts. And that’s ok.  We  are all touched by sin.

Which brings me to my most important observation in a very long time.  This one has brought me more joy this year than I have ever had.  It makes more sense than anything I have ever learned.

1)     I don’t have to pretend anymore. Jesus loves me just the way I am. But He loves me too much to leave this way. 

Your Love

Before the world began

You held me in Your hands

And that’s the way it was      

From the start

And then You sent Your son

Your Love, Your only One

To set me free again

Back to Your heart

Your Love  

Is faithful and true         

Your Love           

Makes all things new        

Your love   

Is moving the mountains to save me     

  

Your Blood     

Has covered my sin   

So I        

Can become like Jesus     

Now I      

Will worship my Lord  

Forever

         

Your Love

  

You’re there when I’m alone

I’m never on my own

Your Spirit comforts me           

In the night

And when the morning comes

You tell me I belong

To my Savior and my God 

Jesus Christ

Nothing can separate me now                  

From Your Love

Death and the grave             

Cannot hold me back                

From Your Love

Your love

Is setting me free

Your love

Is all that I need

Your love

                                                                                                                          

Fight the Powers

Want to fight the powers? Good!

'Cuz the 'powers' of darkness have wanted to blind you since you were born. Blind you with anger. With rebellion. Lust. Pride. Greed. Hatred. Strife. Jealousy. Envy.

How did the enemy do this? Whom did he use? Parents? Relatives? Friends? What did the enemy do to you to blind you? Abuse you? Rape you? Forsake you?

Are you willing to forgive? To love again? It's not easy. But it has to be done. Because the powers of darkness will try and convince you that love and peace and forgiveness have always been a waste of time. How do we know that these things are the work of darkness? Is this the work of an actual enemy? The word of God tells us:

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."~ Ephesians 6:12

They have been after you because they hate God and therefore hate His most prized possession: You! 

 

So, in the name of Jesus, FIGHT THE POWERS, and forgive, live and love again!

Beautiful Jesus

I love when God gives me simple songs to sing to Him. I so want to share them with the rest of the world and hope that the joy He gives me can be yours and yours and yours as well. He really is a good God and a loving Shepherd.

I was in the chapel tonight working on a instrumental piece I'm titling "Desert River". It's almost done when I have an urge to sing to my Creator and Savior. Really, what I believe He was shooting for in this song is to remind me again of who I write music for.

It's Him.

Beautiful Jesus

With a humble heart I sing
Of  Your Majesty
It's all around me
The creation of my King

And when I think about Your love
How You lived for me
You bled and died for me
On the cross at Calvary

And the sacrifice You made
For my sin
The price is paid
Then You conquered death for me
The vic'try won

And with heaven as Your throne
You made my heart Your home

Beautiful Jesus
Beautiful Jesus

Lonely Boy

Psalms 27:10
“When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.”

I feel like a fatherless child tonight. Ever feel that way? Why do Christians still feel like this? We have a Lover who is not only willing to meet our needs, but supply every one with a gladness in His heart. It pleases Him to do it. He has met my physical needs. My emotional needs. My spiritual needs. Yes, He has. His name is Jesus.

I am in need of nothing. Nothing but Him.

It's June 23, 2012. As I write this, I'm sitting at a desk that is not mine, typing on a keyboard that is not mine, using a computer that is..not mine. I am listening to music through headphones that are not mine. When I go to bed tonight, I will lay in a bed that is not mine. My head will be on a pillow that is not mine. I am reading books on loan. Playing a piano that is ministry owned. Eating meals that are donated to Life Challenge and cooked at the same time every day. I have never purchased a meal here. Every single thing I am wearing right now from my shirt down to my shoes are donated. Literally.

 Truth is, if I confess to you tonight all of the things that are mine, the list would be very short and compact. I could fit everything I "own" in a suitcase right now.

When I arrived at LC in January 2011, I had no idea I would be here this long. Then again, when I got here that winter, I really didn't care. I just wanted to go somewhere and live again. I needed Christ to raise me up. From the dead.

And that He has done. Praise His Name.

But, on days like today, I fell so lonely. Everywhere I turn I feel like an orphan. Abandoned. I have friends. I still have family that loves me. Brothers in Christ,as well. It doesn't seem to be enough. This is not new. I have felt this way since I can remember. As a young child, I would never feel like I was an important part of anyone's life. Did this have to do with the environment my parents brought me up in? More than likely. And when I felt like this, it was a trigger for me to go and get high, drunk and out of my mind. And that I did. From the time I could leave the house by myself at night I was smoking and drinking. Pills came. LSD. Heroin. It didn't matter. The loneliness was always too much.

I searched and searched for a woman to meet that need, to heal my loneliness. My wife was never meant for that. Neither were any of the women before her. Or after. None have been given that job characteristic or description: you are created to meet all of Pat's needs.

It is obvious that being a visible musician helps that feeling of loneliness. All I have to do is play for everyone. Lead in worship. Sing a song. Then I feel love. But the aching, gnawing feeling always returns.

It's Jesus I need. It's Him I desire. He is all I need, and I know it. In my soul, He has filled that gap over and over and over and over..and He is healing that loneliness.

Matthew 11:29 “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Tonight I will rest my head on that donated pillow and feel the breeze the fan on loan is blowing in my face and praise the One who made me this way. This pain MUST ALWAYS LEAD ME TO HIM and no one or nothing else.

Lamentations 3:24-25 “”The LORD is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I have hope in Him.” The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, To the person who seeks Him.”